SQUIRRELS!!!!!

Welcome!

 

 Many believe that it is their parents who are the weirdest, that they belong in some sort of institute for the insane and mentally ill. I make no claims like that towards my own mother (Although there are times I wonder)

 I have decided after spending many years listening to the weird and sometimes inappropriate comments from my mother, to release them into the world. So that is what I'm doing. Note this is not for the faint hearted and children may want to leave the room.

 

Are we sitting comfortably? Let’s begin.....

 

I think I shall start with one of my personally favourites. Squirrels. That right I said Squirrels those cute, bushy tailed wide eye tree dwellers.

They couldn't possibly have an ulterior motive, could they?.

There are three types of Squirrels. The American Grey, The English Red and The Black Squirrel.

 

See The American Grey Squirrel have decided they are no longer content with their own country, they want the world, Reason Why: They're American.

Now to the Brave Noble English Red Squirrel, these are reincarnated shaolin monks sent to prevent the Grey Squirrels from succeeding in their dastardly plans of WORLD DOMINATION! (Insert Evil Laugh) The Grey Squirrels have in the previous year’s been able to triumph against the Red Squirrels, (Boooooo!) but this time they have encountered more than a little resistance (Yaaaaaay)

So now they have hired The Black Squirrel, who are mercenaries and ninjas to kill the Red Squirrels, Of course they are no match for the Reincarnated shaolin monks.

 

The Battle for the world continues still, so next time you see a squirrel, remember this story,